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| 369 Days
I realized the other day that it's been over a year since I last posted on xanga. A year of changes and new adventures:
* I became the chairperson of the math department of my school and had a great second year of teaching at my alma mater.
* My JV boys basketball team went 23-1, with our only loss being an overtime loss to Jason Kidd's alma mater, St. Joseph's High School.
* I got to be the musical director of the school musical, "Nightmare on Key Route." I had a sensational time working with a cast of over 100 talented middle school kids and they put on a terrific show.
* I had an intense year in my relationship with God. He stretched and grew
me in ways that I never would have imagined. He taught me so many real life lessons in evangelism and trust in God that I am so grateful for. The times weren't necessarily easy to go through, but I felt so blessed to have have God's hand watching over me through each and every step of the way.
I survived my first year in my humble little condo. Which, incidentally, leads me to a little request I have. My roommate moved out a couple months ago and I am currently looking for a new roommate to share my 2 bedroom place. If you know of anybody, perhaps a Cal grad student or a young working guy, please let me know or let them know of the availability of my place in El Cerrito. Thanks.
I'll try, but not promise, to post more often. :) | | |
| Swimming, Reading, and Passion
I had a cool experience while swimming today. This summer, I’ve taken up lap swimming three times a week. I swim at noon, and the people who usually frequent the pool during that time slot are either older folk or guys like me who are trying to get their fat butts into some sort of shape.
So today as I’m swimming, I see this middle aged Indian dude come in with his little girl. I figure he’s going to lap swim while she plays around in the pool. Initially, they are at the other side of the pool in the slow lane, so I don’t really pay any attention to them. Then they migrate over to the medium paced lane that I’m in and I’m thinking, “Oh no, this little girl is just going to be playing around in the shallow end and get in the way of our swimming.”
Boy, was I wrong! This little girl was swimming like a fish, doing lap after lap with her dad. During one of my resting times, I chatted with her and found out that she’s only SIX YEARS OLD! I was dumbfounded. She was able to do every single stroke. And she swam with such ease and grace. Swimming seemed to be second nature to her. It was fun just to watch her swim! She proudly told me that she had been swimming since she was four years old. In fact, her whole family swam. When she did the butterfly, it looked liked she was a little dolphin gliding through the water effortlessly. But what I thought to be the coolest thing was that she was lap swimming with her daddy. That was just beautiful. Father and daughter laughing and talking and swimming and splashing each other… She was even giving her dad pointers on how he could improve his form. It was soooo cute! Of course, towards the end of the time, the customary father-daughter race took place and the reward was the exciting opportunity to choose what they were having for lunch. Alas, little Ariana dusted dad with her butterfly and the noontime meal would consist of Jamba Juice and pizza. She had such a sweet little smile and she waved good-bye to me when the hour of lap swim was over (yes, she swam for a whole hour! And yes, I did too! J). I hope I have the opportunity to lap swim with my daughter when I reach that stage in life. Truly a beautiful thing to behold… J
I’ve also been doing a lot of reading this summer… So far, I’ve gotten through all the Dan Brown books and a couple other books:
The Da’Vinci Code
Angels and Demons
Digital Fortress
Deception Point
A Series of Unfortunate Events (book 3 and 4) – great funny reads!
They were all great reads! I’m currently reading “Life of Pi” and I plan to read “The Lovely Bones” next. Anybody out there have suggestions for good summer reading after I get through these two? I haven’t been this excited about reading since I was in grade school. Maybe it’s because I’m becoming an old man and getting old man habits. Or maybe it’s my teacher side coming out. But lately, I’ve found myself enjoying reading more than most movies I see! Go figure!
Besides swimming and reading, one other thing I’ve had a chance to do a lot more this summer is to spend time reading the Bible, praying, and figuring out what God wants me to do in life. The one thing that has come up over and over is the idea of passion. The greatest desire of my heart is to love God passionately and to live each day passionately for God. I don’t want life to ever become “just routine.” A friend of mine challenged me recently to actively look at every situation in life as an opportunity to glorify God, to show God’s love to people, and to share God’s message with people. He told me that that is what keeps him invigorated, it’s what keeps him from merely being another Joe Schmo who’s just running the proverbial “rat race.” That’s what keeps him excited about life each day: that purpose that is bigger than he is. I want to live that passionate and purposeful life as well. And I want it to permeate all areas of my life. I want to coach with passion, teach with passion, lead music at church with passion, be the fiercely loyal and passionate friend… And I want all that passion not to be humanly passion, but indeed I want that passion to be a reflection of the love and gratitude I hold for my God. A reflection of the passion with which Christ loved mankind. That’s the passion that I want to live.
“This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers. If anyone has material possessions and sees his brother in need but has no pity on him, how can the love of God be in him? Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth.” 1 John 3:16-18
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| Signs That the End is Near
The other day I was giving one of the final tests of the year to one of my classes. I go through my normal test day procedure by passing out the test folders. Test folders are basically two manila folders that are taped together. They are erected around each student and used as shields so that students cannot Compromise the integrity of tHe tEAT (cheat). Anyhow, after I pass out the folders and tell the class to be quiet, I proceed to scan the classroom in order to take attendance. After putting the attendance sheets in the hallway to be collected, I settle down to do some paperwork while the kids are testing. I soon notice that the students aren’t completely quiet like I expect them to be during testing time. I warn them sternly and go back to what I was doing. After another minute, I notice that they have not heeded my warning at all and that several are still chatting away. As I looked around the room, I observe that some kids hadn’t even started the test yet. At this point, I clear my throat and prepare to unleash my mean-and-super-serious lecture voice on the kiddos when I finally figure out what is going on. With the whole class staring at me, I begin cracking up and sheepishly say, “I didn’t pass out the tests yet, did I?” J ~Sigh~ Yes, the end is near…
The end of the year also brings with it a tremendous dilemma for me. This is one that I have been stressing about and losing some sleep over. For the last week and a half, I have been dreading this particular problem and I’ve been trying to brainstorm an adequate solution. Alas, I have not been able to conjure up a clever escape to this quagmire. And today, the moment of truth finally arrived where I had to face this dilemma head on. Here’s how it went down: It was 8th period, the last period of the day. The class had some free time and I was calmly minding my own business when it happened. A girl nonchalantly approached me, armed with her special end-of-the-year gel pen and virgin yearbook in hand, and said, “Mr. Lew, will you sign my yearbook?” I panicked. I had no idea what to write. Two weeks of thinking about it had not produced anything short and clever as I had hoped. I harkened back to my own middle school days to see if inspiration would strike. Alas, such clever adolescent acronyms such as “K.I.T.” and “B.F.F.” and popular teen phrases such as “Stay cool” or “Have a nice summer” didn’t seem quite me. One of my colleagues told me that he had a special stamp just for the occasion. For every student that approaches him, he pulls out the stamp which reads “You’re my favorite student” and quickly stamps the very thoughtful and meaningful and special and personal phrase in their yearbook. The stamp even has his signature imprinted on it. If only I had been as well prepared as him. So, I’m going to appeal to my readers for help. What can I sign in yearbooks that is 1) clever / witty and 2) short? Help me! I need ideas!
Cool Bible verse of the day:
"Two things I ask of you, O LORD ;
do not refuse me before I die:
Keep falsehood and lies far from me;
give me neither poverty nor riches,
but give me only my daily bread.
Otherwise, I may have too much and disown you
and say, 'Who is the LORD ?'
Or I may become poor and steal,
and so dishonor the name of my God.
Proverbs 30:7-9
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| Mixed Feelings
~from new beginings to tragic endings and back~
(reader beware: this is a long entry, but I haven't written in forever - well, a month - and this makes up for it)
As of today, there are officially 8 days remaining in my first year of teaching at my alma mater, Albany Middle School. The end of the school year brings with it many mixed emotions for me personally.
On the one hand, it’s been a tremendously positive year. After five long, hard years, I made the move from teaching 4th and 5th grade in a district that is quickly deteriorating, to teaching 8th grade algebra at the middle school that I attended as a wee lad. What an incredible blessing this transition has been! From day one, the staff has been so amazingly supportive and welcoming! Whether it was an old teacher of mine or a teacher who’s been around just the last few years, everybody took the time out to make sure I had what I needed and to walk me through things that I was clueless about. I have come to love the staff at AMS!
The kids were also great! Not only was the teaching aspect fun (who’da thunk that teaching algebra could be fun?!?!?!), but it was really cool to see the kids in different contexts: performing in the school musical, various sports (basketball, volleyball, wrestling), DJ-ing, camping, concerts, dances, etc. The other thing I really appreciated was getting a chance to really get to know the kids. There were a few students who I had an extremely hard time with at the beginning of the school year. I couldn’t stand these certain individuals because they’d talk and disrupt the class and they would just generally drive me crazy. I was constantly sending them out and I was just really frustrated. But something really cool happened about a third way into the year. At the peak of my frustration with these individuals, I decided that I would make a concerted effort to get to know these kids, to talk to them more, and most importantly, to have them sit in the front of the class by me. That was the biggest thing that really turned things around for me, having daily interactions with these kids. It was through these interactions that I really got to know who these kids were, what made them tick, and to truly appreciate them as people. By the end of the year, I found that some of these kids that I had the hardest time with at the beginning of the year were ones that I ended up appreciating the most. I truly treasure the relationship that I have with my students. It’s cool that my relationship with them has extended beyond the mere teacher-pupil relationship, but I’ve truly gotten to know the kids as people.
Which brings me to my next point… I am actually kinda sad that my year with this bunch of kids is over. They’re all really good kids at heart, and I’ve truly come to enjoy them (well, most of the time – I won’t lie J). I’m glad I started my career at Albany with this group of kids because I've had the opportunity to get to know and love this bunch of kids and all their different personalities. The rest and relaxation of summer beckons, but it is a somewhat bittersweet feeling, knowing that my time with this group of kids will conclude in 8 days.
And lastly, this morning brought with it a sobering dose of harsh reality. This weekend, a 9th grade student from the high school who graduated from AMS last year, committed suicide by hanging herself. I didn't know her personally, but from all accounts that I heard from people who knew her, she was a cheerful and happy student. She was a cheerleader, had lots of friends, and laughed a lot. Apparently a rut of depression was too much for her to handle and she chose to end her life. As I’ve gotten to know my students on a deeper level this year, my heart breaks to hear about some of the stuff that they have to go through in life. I honestly don’t know how some of these kids hold it together. Kids who are 13 or 14 shouldn’t have to deal with what some of these kids have to deal with on a daily basis. Some of these kids have already had more than their fair share of tragedies and adversity in life. Yes, even in a rather affluent neighborhood such as the one that I teach at, there are still sooo many “issues” out there that these kids face. I thought that after I left my last “ghetto” school, things would be peachy keen in Albany, but alas, people will be people wherever you go. And because people will always be people, there will always be tough things in life. Absolutely no one is immune to life issues, no matter how sheltered or supposedly “well off” a community is.
Which makes me all the more resolute to continue teaching. A lot of people ask me how long I’m going to teach, as if it’s some sort of temporary job. Not only do I enjoy what I do, but I think that God has given me certain talents and traits that enable me to reach and teach young people effectively (some may call it a curse, but I’ll beg to differ - maybe I'm crazy). So no, I have no plans of leaving the profession, God has given me too big a burden for these kids, and too big of a love for them as well. Some people look down on the teaching profession, but I had this thought today and it kinda blew me away. I had direct contact with 150 students this year. After 10 years of teaching year, I will have been in contact with 1,500 kids. After 20 years, that’s 3,000 kids (yeah, my math side is coming out). That’s a HUGE responsibility, to think that I will have influence on that many lives in my profession. Kinda scary actually… But I love teaching, and I love the kids. And you know, I honestly wouldn’t trade it for the world…
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| One Small Step For Man…
i don't think i'll ever "grow up"... i've got too much "kid" inside of me... it helps me to keep life fun in all that I do… even in something like teaching math… J
because i’ve always felt like a big kid, the passing of age in the form of birthdays has never really been a big deal to me… some people get all excited over certain birthdays… their sweet 16th… their 18th.... maybe on their 21st, they go out and get a drink or something… for me, it’s never been a big deal… maybe it’s because my parents never threw me lavish birthday parties when I was a kid and I’ve been scarred for life… poor me… J i dunno… even as i’m on the verge of another supposed “big birthday”, to me it’s just like another day for me, it's doesn't really mean much…
i guess i measure my life more by momentous occasions and transitions into different stages in life… things like becoming a Christian… going off to college… starting off my career… teaching at a new school... those are the things that have catapulted me into new stages of life and have given me a new perspective and direction in life… but through all of those transitions, I’ve still always felt like a big kid… today, something momentous happened that made me feel all “adult” (shudder)… on Tuesday, i made an offer to buy a condo and today, the offer was accepted and now i’m on my way towards homeownership… super scary… there’s nothing to make you feel all adult than to suddenly be in debt several hundred thousand dollars… absolute INSANITY!!
i’ve been looking around for a place for the last month and a half or so… i never thought things would happen this fast… it’s just been a total blur… it still really hasn’t hit me quite yet… it doesn’t feel real… almost like i’m just playing a video game and i can just hit the off button and my normal life will resume again… tho a little more reality sets in each time I have to write another fatty check to move the process along…
anyhow, i’ll write more as i get a chance to process this more… just wanted to get something out cuz people have been bugging me to xanga… J
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